Yesterday I ran another 2.5 miles at the gym! I felt REALLY good mentally with a "runners high" but a little queasy and I'm still kind of feeling it. It doesn't help that my jaw has been a lot worse the last two days.
And this is part of the reason why it's 3:30 PM and I've hardly accomplished anything today. The other part of the reason is that I'm lazy and have a ton of excuses. I was talking with Angela last night about how hard it is to know when to give yourself a break because of valid reasons, and when you're using those "valid reasons" to get away with more than you should. Usually you have to push yourself despite those "valid reasons" - you still have to go to work, go to school, be a mom, be a wife. You might have very valid excuses but sometimes it's up to you whether you claim them or not.
At the same time there has to be some grace for yourself. I know so well how horrible your life can be if you're constantly pushing yourself, never satisfied with yourself, not letting yourself make mistakes.
Obviously I've been very introspective lately. =) thanks for listening.
Here are my goals for the rest of today:
- BIOL quiz 3
- BIOL lab and report
- ENGL response 1
- ENGL response 2
- Dishes
- Gym if I finish everything here!
Oh, and I thrive on comments. So please encourage me. You all know my love language is words!
Edit:
I don't know what's wrong with me but I still feel like vomiting and I have cold sweats and am shaking. Went back to bed and couldn't get warm. Feel like crap. Herbal tea for me now.
I'm so glad you are enjoying going to the gym, even if you didn't feel very well after this trip! Sounds like you're making progress!
ReplyDeleteHere are my thoughts on this whole "give yourself a break thing". You asked for a comment, you're gonna get one, girl!
Now, I know I am someone who gets a lot done. I am highly motivated and a little bit of an over-achiever, and a little bit annoying to some people because I am a little obsessed with having things look good. I will not even let a random high schooler come over without vacuuming and spiffing up our home first. What does this say about me? I am probably way too obsessed with appearances. ANYWAY, my point is that I'm not saying this is ALL good - there are flaws with all personalities (duh), I'm just saying this is my personality! OK and I should stop trying to justify myself. But, believe me, you can do too much and not be satisfied enough with what you have done (just like you were saying).
The thing that both Jeremy and I have come to realize and grow a lot in this year, is finding joy in the mundane and living life in the present. We can make lists that go on and on and on with things we "need" to accomplish, and always be looking ahead, never coming out from under our pile of To-Do's or feeling like a good enough wife, mother, or friend. Yes, we need to take care of our homes and families, we need to complete our schoolwork or go to work (whatever applies), but we also need to ENJOY these things that God has given us! It's not about how much you do or how little you do, its all about the attitude you do it with, the joy you are filled with and spreading to others, and the wonderful, heaven-sent rest that you receive whether you are working or just relaxing.
SO, I say, don't feel bad about giving yourself a "break"! Especially if you feel like you don't deserve it, because you know what! Maybe you need to stop and readjust and find your joy and rest again, so that the things you do will have more meaning.
Maybe none of that made any sense to anyone, but I've come to enjoy our life so much more since I started REALLY focusing on joy and taking every moment as a precious gift. Hard to do a lot of times, we get busy, but its a discipline I believe I need to continually work on.
Anyway....I hope you feel better soon! Love you! Sorry to hear your jaw isn't feeling better either - I'll be praying for you!
Oh man, I can say nothing after Becca's comment, she took the words right out of my mouth. And I do the same thing as Becca, I wanted to spiff up the house for a friend who was coming over...one I lived with. She knows me, why the heck was I trying to that? Who knows. But I agree with Becca, we need to enjoy the things God has given us and not always focus on our unfinished to do lists. Loves!
ReplyDeleteYou girls brought tears to my eyes. Very meaningful words. Bedtime now (after two naps today, haha). I will comment better tomorrow, for now I"ll just say thank you. So much.
ReplyDelete