Monday, February 7, 2011

Oh girls! This is a prelude to a significant post I will write in the next couple days. I have bathroom pictures and stuff, but I've been more busy than usual and finding it hard to get motivation to write on the blog when I have other stuff to do! Quick updates though:

The last week and a half I've had jaw pain in my right jaw. Went to the doctor yesterday, I somehow sprained my TMJ. I think it stands for temporomandibular joint? Angela will know. Anyway, I'm not supposed to open my mouth wider than the width of my index finger. So basically I can't chew or sing or yawn or laugh and I can barely talk! Poor Joe is so tired of oatmeal and canned soup and bean soup since I can't chew. And I have to take ibuprofin constantly, in fact I need to take some now.

No news on the house front, I'm emailing our agent today.

I have quite the messy house but Joe encouraged me last night and said to spend a certain number of time on school, then be done with school, then work on the house. So I've done about 45 minutes of hardcore school this morning and gotten a lot done! Now I'm going to give my TMJ some TLC (haha), take medicine and, yes, go back to bed since I got up early to make Joe lunch. I bought myself tapioca the other day so I'll make myself some pudding with my lunch!

Okay, the doctor said I have this jaw thing because I get too anxious and stressed out. And I know it but I don't know what to do about it! I grind my teeth all night - I grit my teeth while I'm falling asleep - I dream all night about the stuff I have to do and keep waking up. It's only been like this for a week but I don't know why! Even relaxing things I do, I'm clenching my teeth and I can't focus because I'm compiling my mental to-do lists. I broke down in tears last night because of all this weirdness. Oh, and I've never liked cleaning but this last week it's been like pulling teeth to get myself to do it. It takes so much willpower just to force myself to get up and unload the dishwasher, and sometimes I don't even finish unloading it. What is my problem? I know I have to do it even if I don't want to, but why do I hate it so much?

Basically, I don't enjoy anything anymore except going to the gym, probably because it gives me endorphins. I don't enjoy watching tv or playing games or anything. But maybe it's just a phase of this week - ? I don't know.

Thanks for listening to this incredibly hormonal post (which it shouldn't be).

Love you girls.

Well, I'm going to catch up on my sleep with a sweet little cat.

5 comments:

  1. Oh Amber I am praying for you my sister! I wish I could come over and help you out! Just be with you (we wouldn't have to talk) and I could totally help you clean. If Joe works this coming Sunday I can totally come over then, even though that sounds like forever from now! I miss you, I love you, I hope your jaw starts to feel better and that you stop dreaming and thinking about everything that needs to be done. The key is to take things one thing at a time. Don't thing "my house is a mess" think, I am going to clean the kitchen, and not care about the rest of the house, and I will be proud of myself for getting one area clean.

    Miss you. Love you.

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  2. I second Angela's comment. I absolutely understand too - I have TMJ, and I remember right before our wedding it was so bad because I was SO stressed and anxious (and excited), my jaw was constantly popping and very painful in the morning (I would clench my teeth at night too). Do you have a mouth guard? I bought one at Walmart a while ago, and I just use it during times when my TMJ is especially bad - it helps a lot at night. I'm so sorry and hope it feels better soon! Wish I could come over and make you a soft lunch, give you a hug, and help you out! I'm sure its just a phase because you have so much going on with the bathroom remodel, school, the house...don't feel bad about having a good cry during this all!

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  3. Oh girls, thank you for your sweet encouraging comments. becca, I don't have a mouth guard but I'll probably get one since you suggested it.

    I'm eating chocolate now (for lunch...bad Amber). I "slept" while dreaming Joe and I were on vacation but we couldn't enjoy ourselves because my teeth kept falling out. At least every time I woke up, Wiggle was snuggling with me

    You have no idea how much your encouragement means to me, ladies! I feel so much better. And becca you're right - I'm sure it's just a phase. Thank you both for your prayers!

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  4. I have felt hormonal lately too, just very moody and easily sad. I was listening on the radio and they were talking about winter depression symptoms, and I think thats what I have. I need grass, leaves and sunshine! I hope that your jaw gets better soon, I think I would be getting cranky not able to eat everything I want, but you sound like you are handling it well. At least you can still drink tea! I'll be thinking about you and praying for you this week. I miss you, and wish I could come over. Maybe that's what I'll do, just show up on your door sometime!

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  5. Aww cousin, I'd love it if you just showed up! And you're right, at least I can still drink tea. I haven't today but I will for sure.

    I'm done with my schoolwork for today and I've cleaned about half the kitchen and started a load of dishes! The floors need SCRUBBING from the dirt the boys have been tracking around from doing the bathroom. I'm really not looking forward to that. Really. But I'm happy with what I've done. I might go to the gym today...I'm kind of scared to run with my jaw bouncing around but maybe I'll do some resistance training, as long as I don't grimace too much. And then sauna!

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